Monday
Jul122010
Food for thought...
Monday, July 12, 2010
I have a couple of girlfriends that are back on the dating scene. While I know this is exciting, I just want to make mention of a couple of precautions, I believe, are very important.
Men date you and then they tend to get bored sometimes if you are always available at their "beck and call". Try to pace yourself and give them a chance to show their interest also. Kinda like a dance. He takes one step, you take one step. If you are doing all the stepping, you're dancing solo, lol. But, hey, some never notice until it becomes tiring and maybe too late.
Occasionally, you'll have those rare cases where you met someone and you're with them everyday from that day forward. This may be feel like the best scenario ever but before getting caught up and whisked away in emotion, take those first couple of days to ground yourself and take inventory of who you are, who they are and if that's what will really work for you long term. Then brace yourself! And, understand, that there is so much about this person you don't know yet. So, you musn't assume that just because you feel it's perfect that your beau is the perfect person. Who knows what you may learn about who this man really is. No one is perfect, so understand that he may have flaws that will surprise you, upset you and even disappoint you, if he is human (you might have yourself a robot), lol. You have to "know when to hold'em, know when to roll'em, know when to walk away, know when to run"(Lyrics from "The Gambler"), lol! Be cautious but not unrealistic.
Most Importantly: WOMEN never doubt yourselves! Know your worth! ("Priceless...far above rubies"). Know what you deserve and never settle. Don't let insecurity eat you up. Always, put God first. In Him, there is no competition. Therefore, you shouldn't have to worry about the next woman. Do you! No one can compete with who God made you to be. There is no match, so be confident.
I feel like I married my dream guy. We have had problems, but I know ultimately God made him just for me. He is my best friend and I love a man that is respected. Guys will do only what you allow them to do. That's why it's important to get to know a guy and date for a while before you decide to take it to the next phase cause once that's crossed, there is no turning back.
Tip: Expect more..
Occasionally, you'll have those rare cases where you met someone and you're with them everyday from that day forward. This may be feel like the best scenario ever but before getting caught up and whisked away in emotion, take those first couple of days to ground yourself and take inventory of who you are, who they are and if that's what will really work for you long term. Then brace yourself! And, understand, that there is so much about this person you don't know yet. So, you musn't assume that just because you feel it's perfect that your beau is the perfect person. Who knows what you may learn about who this man really is. No one is perfect, so understand that he may have flaws that will surprise you, upset you and even disappoint you, if he is human (you might have yourself a robot), lol. You have to "know when to hold'em, know when to roll'em, know when to walk away, know when to run"(Lyrics from "The Gambler"), lol! Be cautious but not unrealistic.
Most Importantly: WOMEN never doubt yourselves! Know your worth! ("Priceless...far above rubies"). Know what you deserve and never settle. Don't let insecurity eat you up. Always, put God first. In Him, there is no competition. Therefore, you shouldn't have to worry about the next woman. Do you! No one can compete with who God made you to be. There is no match, so be confident.
I feel like I married my dream guy. We have had problems, but I know ultimately God made him just for me. He is my best friend and I love a man that is respected. Guys will do only what you allow them to do. That's why it's important to get to know a guy and date for a while before you decide to take it to the next phase cause once that's crossed, there is no turning back.
Tip: Expect more..
Reader Comments (29)
Omg ur so right I think as women we over think things so we shld ask but then we don't want to be miss I wanna talk eaverytime..try talking and maybe the things that have you questions about can get answered without you bringing up your DRAMA.… a man once told me that a woman should complain or speak her mind so the man knows what she wants...he's not from here. Don't forget your worth make him work for you but don't make him tired.
That's beautiful cuzzin...A lot if women forget and lose their way in the middle of relationships eventually losing themselves. Good food for thought. We all need to be reminded of our worth.
I love this post TS. I love how you always highlight "Put God first". That's important in every aspect of life. Yes, a woman's worth is priceless. Great advice for the women dating. Oddly enough, it was only until I took a spiritual sabbatical for a little over a year, that's when I realized who my dream guy always was.
My grandmother use to tell me "watch how a man treat his mom" & that's how he'll treat you.
Good men tips
good advice!
So true. Agree with you 100% here.
This came right on time. I needed these words today. Thanks tanya.
I wholeheartedly agree, I don't think I ever followed your advice above and I just got lucky in the end =/ if only girls took advice...very well put post, keep it up!
Awesome post, darling!
Fave quote: "Know your worth"!
xoxox,
CC
Such a cute blouse! love the way it goes with the rest of the outfit
You are absolutely rt ! good advice T......... If he gets the prize b4 the compitition whats the point of entering ???? Once hes got the prize he wont cherish it, as much as he wouldve if he had to work hard 4 it ........ PPL tend to cherish and appreciate the things in Life that they had to put EFFORT into, NOTHING worth KEEPIN comes easy........... Love the sophisticated look A REALl man RESPECTS a woman with CLASS...... Outfit is A Great calaboration with the subject........ :)
Luv luv luv the hair! Luv the whole look, hair, earrings, blouse. You look like business will be handled : ) You know how I feel about the text...100,000.
Oh and I love that song. I need to get that in my car.
I wish I read this post before I started dating because when I realized what you said, it's too late!! Great post!! Hope you'll post something like it again!! xoxoxoxoo
Great post!!
Knowing your self worth is so important in any relationship because without that, you will continue to repeat the same cycle and not realize it, until it's too late... Very well said Tanya! By the way, cute hair, blouse and skirt...
this is spot on. i know a few girls who can stand to read this for sure. i don't care if you've been together for 30 days or 30 years, you NEVER loose sight of yourself and what's important to you.
love your top and LOVE the messy bun!
Girl those aresome words of wisdom.... you ain't never lied they will only get away with what you allow them to get away with! On the other hand Cute outfit and I love that bun it's sooooooo cute! Very natural look beautiful! :)
I agree but I believe alot of women make mistakes in choosing the men because they choose to date without consulting God first. In this scary day and age, a woman's instinct is not enough to determine if a man is worth her time. There are all sorts of liars, cheaters, and wierdos who are good at hiding who they truly are.
We must seek God's wisdom in deciding if a certain guy is a man of integrity in the eyes of God.
Ladies, If there is no man in your life at this point, there may be a reason. God may be readying you for your husband. Seek him first and allow him to ready you and choose who your spouse should be. It could not only spare you a lifetime of heartache and pain but it could yield you a wonderful God fearing man who will love you like Christ loves the church! That means he loves you with a selfless, sacrificial, giving heart. He will be willing to die for you. He protects, provides and takes care of you. Isn't that wonderful? That's what God has in store for ever woman who will seek him for her husband.
I thank God for this revelation because it has caused me to leave an abusive relationship and let God heal me and prepare me for my chosen husband.
If you ladies ever need more info on how to trust God for your husband...the man God has chosen for you, please visit my church home
singles pleasing the Lord
God bless you all
Well said! Thanks for stopping by with your words of wisdom. :)